Hanoi Life

Fashion Show!!

Tuần lẽ thời trang is Vietnamese for Fashion Week.  Every year at this time, there is a big fashion show right here at Sofitel Plaza featuring the work of the top designers.  By virtue of our living here, we were offered tickets and we attended opening night.

The sister of our friend Minh Hải, whose wedding we recently attended, is Vũ Thu Giang, one of the best designers in Hanoi.  Unfortunately her designs will be shown on a night when we are unable to attend, so we will have to visit her showroom.

We did see Toàn, another young designer with whom we sat at the wedding.  In fact we sat with him so were able to gain at least a bit of insight into who the designers were and how the Hanoi fashion world turns.  Strange as it may seem, apparently no buyers attend the shows, making it a bit difficult to sell the clothes.

The show is quite spectacular, though of course most of the outfits are designed for young people, so even were we as slim as the models, we would likely look a bit, NO totally out of place were we to wear most of the designs.

There were a few dresses that actually looked as if someone might actually wear them somewhere other than in a fashion show, but many of them were a bit extreme in their cut or color.  However they were striking and quite exciting to watch as the tall young models paraded down the runway.  Tall is tall by any standard as most of the women were at least 1.75 m and when they had the tall hairdos, they were even taller.

The first set of designs focused on a musical theme, with instruments emblazoned on many of the clothes and four models playing air guitar as accompaniment.

There were blacks, whites and pinks with a few other shades mixed in.  The girls, towering over us in their platform heels, gave us all a good opportunity to see the designs up close. 

It was difficult to get good photos as the models moved briskly and there was seldom a good angle through the standing-room-only crowd. 

The men's outfits were mostly long shorts with athletic tops and the models were joined by two break dancers!  Ira is thinking he might be trying out a few of the outfits since he has a youthful figure and hardly any body hair, NOT!!!

The music of course was quite loud for our old fogie ears, but all in all it was great to   have a first-hand look at the work of the young people who are shaping the fashion scene here in Hanoi.

It's Great to be Noticed

When we categorize our blog as The Expat Life(modified) it is because we live differently from many of Carol's colleagues and the people Ira meets, mostly AmCham members.  Under oath we can say that we are not now nor have we ever been backpackers.  Ira does carry a backpack but it contains books and a tie and some papers, not the sum total of his worldly goods.

Many of the people with whom Carol teaches have done a lot of backpacking so they feel that even on vacation, or "holiday" in their language, a 5 star hotel is a useless extravagance.  Some of them manage lodging(can't really dignify it with the term "hotel") at under 10$ a night and eat for less than $5 a day.  In a way we envy them because if that were our budget, we would now be rich, or at least richer than we are today.  But then if we lived that way, we would be they.

Most people live in houses and apartments that are not serviced and have a maid to clean, shop and cook.  These can be hired at quite a reasonable salary.  While we have 24 hour service and security, we still interact with the community at large by shopping at the local market and eating in local restaurants.  We also think that we talk more with taxi drivers than others do riding the xe om(motorbike taxi).

Ira likes to think that his speaking Vietnamese, despite some problems in understanding and being understood, have made him closer to the Hanoians and have enabled him to have a lot of interaction, especially, difficult as this may be for you to believe, with children and old people!  By old we mean even older than we are.  "Chào Cháu" says Ira to the adorable child.  Then the adult prompts the child, who may well be frightened by this large person with strange features who is saying something in an incomprehensible accent, to pipe up with " Cháu chào bác!"  In greeting someone older, the child usually as a sign of respect identifies him or herself as cháu or child(young person who can be as old as say 30) and then greets the elder.  Ira's Vietnamese readers will no doubt be quick to correct him if this is not quite the case.

Yesterday we had several incidents that let us know we have not totally flown under the radar during our time here in Hanoi.  When Ira jumped on the bus to go down to teach, he was warmly greeted by the bus driver.  A few months of riding the same bus can make one recognizable and Ira has to admit he is not one to blend in.

We ate dinner at Sen, the buffet restaurant that serves many hundreds every night.  As we were finishing, one of the managers, whom we have encountered quite a few times, came over and spoke with Ira in Vietnamese, telling us he hadn't seen us in a while and asking how we were. 

When we caught a taxi to come back home, it was not one of our Sofitel fleet, but as we got in, the driver said "Sofitel!"  It turns out he has driven us before.  Small world nhé?  Small city anyway.

When we got home, Ira called Le Beaulieu to make a reservation for Saturday night.  It often isn't necessary, but since they ask you if you have one anyway, it can't hurt.  Actually Ira's years in the restaurant world have made him sensitive to the needs of the restaurant workers.  Dick and Ira used to laugh about the people who would call and ask if they needed to make a reservation.  the usual response was "Now that you've taken the trouble to call, why don;t we just put you in the book?"  As soon as he asked for a reservation for Saturday night, the voice on the other end said  Anh Ira and of course he was correct.  It's not that we are there all that often, but somehow, they know us.

One slightly disappointing thing was that Ira had heard from Dick that a Lehigh Alumni Tour would be coming to Vietnam.  Ira emailed the leader and tried to arrange a meeting.  He was told that they would contact him closer to the time of the trip.  It appears from the online itinerary that they have been and gone without a word.  It might have been fun.  Oh well, they were probably busy visiting all the other Lehigh alums who are here.......

Keep Those Cards and Letters Coming In

The Internet has made communication so much faster and easier.  Carol might say too easy.  We recall  our first trip out of the US, way back in 1984.  That was spooky enough in itself, actually reaching the year about which George Orwell had written.  Isn't life strange?  Orwell spent some significant time in Asia, notably Burma so he keeps cropping up.  Our friends Ralph and Lea probably have a Buddhist word for this phenomenon.  We just say what is, is.  Back to the trip.  We visited such small out-of-the-way towns as London, Paris, Brussels and Amsterdam and had virtually no contact with the world of home other than the odd copy of the International Herald Tribune.  Phone calls would have been extremely costly and no one traveled with a computer.  Cafes were just cafes, places where you went for coffee.  Today, we get emails, Skype phone calls and even photos and videos so that we can see what is going on in the lives of our friends and relatives.  What's next, some sort of real-time camera you can hook up and.....We know!  We just haven't graduated to a web-cam.  As we say in Vietnam: chưa có.

Our friend Angus, whom we met at the Metropolitan Opera many years ago, sent us some fascinating photos of his tattoos!  Angus is a friendly fellow who, not unlike Ira, is capable of throwing himself completely into a topic.  Some of you might call it obsessive but we won't label the behavior.  We had a subscription to the opera for about twenty-five years and were amazed that most of the other people limited their conversation to "excuse me" when they had to squeeze by you.  We were all at the same event after all so why not chat?  "How 'bout that Domingo?!"  "Jimmy's hair is really wild, don't you think?"  Our experience was that most people keep to themselves and quickly avert their eyes when strangers speak to them. 

Not so Angus.  The first time we sat down next to him, he smiled broadly and introduced himself, together with "Ralph and Betty" with whom he had already begun a conversation. At the time Angus was a doctoral student at the University of Connecticut, which we once thought was in Alaska since it is affectionately know as "UConn."  Sounds like "Yukon" and their mascot is the husky.  He was also a novice opera-goer, but he definitely had opinions.  Over the years, we enjoyed chatting with him, hearing of his progress on his thesis, and watching how quickly his opera knowledge increased.

Once when we had duplicate tickets to a performance of "Tristan and Isolde," Angus bought the extra pair and we had a great time at the intermissions.  Wagner is unlike any other opera experience.  We won't try to convert anyone, but it is just unbelievable.  Also the rule about not speaking to strangers is suspended for Wagner.  Everyone freely talks to everyone else.  After all, we are all there for the same reason, aren't we?  There is also this unwritten protocol that is observed, such as no interrupting the action for applause, and silence after the curtain falls on the first act of "Parsifal."  Another such proscription says that the audience does not begin to applaud until the opera is OVER, meaning that the final chords have been played and their echos have ceased to resonate.  Wagner's music builds up a lot of emotion so this is rather a difficult task, especially after six hours of sitting!  At the conclusion of a Wagner opera, there is usually a perceptible silence, eventually broken by a few shouts and then general acclaim.  You may ask "what if the performance isn't so hot?"  Answer:  So far this has never happened.  Anyway, after the "Tristan" the silence was broken by a blood curdling shout from Angus!

We have seen him less since he went off to one of those states west of the Mississippi.  Actually we know it as Oregon, far away but a blue state by last reckoning.  He is a professor at Willamette(emphasis on the second syllable not Will a MET)University.  His influence is far reaching as on Valentine's Day last, we sat next to a former student of his who now lives here in Hanoi.  We should have gotten her card.  Oh well, it's a small town. 

We did meet him for drinks during the Wagner Ring Cycle in 2004 and have stayed in touch by email since.  He did disappoint us a bit when he visited Saigon and couldn't get up here to Hanoi.  In fairness, he did have a tight schedule.

Angus is on sabbatical now and he traveled to one of those countries with an "Sw" meaning Sweden or Switzerland.  Ira often confuses the two, both were neutral, both are expensive, their people speak excellent English with a charming accent.  In Vietnamese they even sound a bit alike Thuỵ Diển  is Sweden, while Thụy Sĩ is Switzerland.  Angus went there to get a few more tattoos, since there were a few square inches on his body that were bare.  His latest include the Rhinemaidens from Wagner's Ring Cycle.  Since this is a family blog, we won't include a picture as the only ones we have are mildly unsuitable for children and some others of delicate sensibilities.  Suffice it to say, he's got a lot of stories to "tell."  We're NOT making this up!

We just heard from Ira's cousin, Bobbie, formally or formerly known as Roberta.  Bobbie's father Harry, Pearl's brother, passed away at a very early age.  He ran restaurants and perhaps that is where Dick Barrows inherited his abilities in that area.  There is also an early photo of Harry to which Dick bears an uncanny resemblance, at least in a certain light. 

Bobbie's son, Scott was married recently in Las Vegas.  Unfortunately the winter storms in the Northeast prevented some guests from making the trip.  All was not lost as they had a video made and were able to send it to us through the miracle of the Internet.  We watched it and enjoyed it very much, especially the shots of Bobbie's mother Fritzie who is now well into her eighties.   Ira was only slightly disappointed that they were not married by Elvis.

We read recently that Vietnamese couples living abroad are now having web-cam weddings so that their friends and family who are unable to attend can view the entire ceremony.  Now if they can only figure a way to email phở!

These trifling reminiscences are not offered for their intrinsic value, merely to point out how communication has progressed and how we are truly all connected.

The Monk Bought Lunch

Actually he didn't.  All he did was stand over Ira who was eating a Vietnamese lunch on the way home from the Fivimart.  There are a number of little establishments, you can't really call them restaurants, on the street that goes around Truc Bach Lake.  They serve light fare, like rice or noodles and meat, fish and vegetables to go with it.  The tables are set up across the street and the food brought to the patrons who can look out over the lake while they eat.

Today's lunch(30,000VND or just under $2) featured steamed rice, fatty pork belly, chicken and for some reason tofu stuffed with ground meat!  Isn't the idea of tofu to replace meat?  Also included was some water spinach or morning glory as it is sometimes called.

Today must have been National Begging Day or "Take a Monk to Lunch Day" because the whole city was crawling with them.  Ira did not contribute on this occasion so he is hoping that his karma has not been damaged. 

What do you do?  Give to one?  Give to all?  Give to none?  Tough choices.

We are certainly sympathetic to the people who live in poverty.  Even many of the middle class Hanoians have far less than we do.  We are not asking "Are there no workhouses?"  We are asking "How much can we do?" 

Generally, it has been our stance not to give to those who just beg but perhaps to buy from some, like last night's enterprising t-shirt vendors.  We consider ourselves lucky to be in a city where there are not many street people and where most people at least have something to eat and a roof over their head.

Perhaps tomorrow's paper will explain why so many monks in robes of so many different colors were out and about.  If not, we just just surmise.

La Di Dah

Even after a year and a half we are making some discoveries here in Hanoi.  Generally we frequent the same group of restaurants, visiting each a couple of times a month, depending on our mood and our schedule, not to mention our perceived fiscal solidarity.  Market down?  Eat noodles at home.  Market up?  Le Beaulieu.  Not exactly the case, but we try not to eat an expensive meal every night, even though the tab is still well below what we might spend in a Western country.

Last night we visited "La" for the first time.  Ira met Wayne, the tall, jolly Norwegian-Canadian who owns this charming little restaurant at a wine-tasting some months ago and as Wayne put it "You threatened to come in."  Wayne is the host and also takes the orders and pours the (generously measured) wines by the glass.  He put us in the window table even though passers-by might be put off by the sight of us.  He had no "beautiful people" so we were there by default.

His menu has a number of Vietnamese dishes but the Western cuisine was why we came.  The portions are more suited to our appetites than at some of the other places around town and the food is quite good and well presented.  Even the sides like red cabbage and mashed potatoes are good!  His bread is crusty and fresh and excellent for dipping into Ira's steamed clams.  There are quite a few upscale restaurants serving good Western cuisine but we will definitely return to "La."

After dinner, we walked through the area, which is near the cathedral and full of high-end tourist boutiques on the way to catching a taxi.  We ran into a group of t-shirt sellers who bombarded us with their wares, particulary one marked 4-X that might be at least double-x and fit Ira.  We chatted with them for several minutes.  It seemed to be a family group with one a grandmotherly type who seemed at least 80.  She told us she was sau muoi tuoi and very old!  This means 60 so she was younger than we are!  Finally after much bargaining we settled on 180,000(around 11 dollars) for four shirts.  they seemed quite pleased and we had no complaints.  The shirts may not last forever, but they will come in useful at the gym.

The Odds Catch Up with Us

Another week goes by with the usual plusses and minuses.  Carol had to work Saturday while Ira's Friday class was held without electricity, making it beastly hot and quite dark.

Ira got some pants altered in that peculiar Vietnamese way where they measure you and the pants but never while you are wearing them.  Nevertheless, they are fine now.  Three pairs taken in(you skeptics who think he's fat and gaining every day, you are so wrong!) and one seam repaired, total 75,000VND or about $5.75 US.

While Carol slaved away, Ira wandered around town laying in provisions for Sunday.  Great Black Forest ham, some emmenthaler, sausages and potates and some Pepperidge Farm double chocolate cookies that cost about the same here as they do in the US.  They also taste just as good!

Saturday night our friend Gun-Marie, the Swedish teacher joined us for drinks, dinner and a fine symphony concert.  We went as usual to the Met Pub where Gun-Marie was duly impressed that the waiter knew our order by heart!  So misspent youth is followed by misspent adult years.  Oh well, it's always good to be remembered.  Dinner at Pane e Vino was fine, shared an antipasto and then we had pasta while our friend opted for porcini pizza.

The concert was very traditional:  "Don Juan" by Richard Strauss and the Dvorak Cello Concerto with a fine Vietnamese cellist made up the first part, while after intermission we heard a spirited Beethoven Symphony No 5(V for Victory for those of you who go back that far). Brahms Hungarian Dance No 5 sent us out into the night humming.  The Vietnam National Symphony is the best of the three groups in Hanoi and they usually give a good show.  We are by now quite familiar with the players, a few of whom we have met when they play at other venues.  One of Carol's young students was at the concert, together with his mother and sister.  They all take violin from Ms Lan, the concertmistress.  When she saw them after the concert, she gave them the bouquet with which she had been presented.  Very nice!

After the show we opted for Gun-Marie's plan of negotiating with a taxi driver rather than trusting to the meter.  We have probably already told you that there are reputable companies, like 26 and 53 and 88888 and a lot of bogus ones with very fast meters that result in high fares.  The idea was to tell the driver to drop us off then continue to Gun-Marie's apartment.  We thought we had a deal at 60,000VND. Apparently, we had misevaluated the position, because when we arrive at Sofitel Plaza, the driver refused to go any farther and demanded 60,000VND.  That's where the fun began!  The usually mild-mannered Swede began screaming at the driver in English, while Ira chimed in in Vietnamese.  At around 10 pm there is a full complement of bellmen and they all came out to sort out the situation.  Bach, who is one of our favorites, asked us what happend and we endeavored to explain the situation.  Like who ya gonna believe, us or some bogus driver of taxi 83?  Finally we said we'd pay 35,000, a typical fare from the Opera House to the hotel, and gun-Marie would take another taxi home.  The driver was adamant.  We stuck to our guns.  Gun-Marie jumped in a real taxi and left.  Finally, Ira threww the 35,000 into the taxi and we went upstairs.  We didn't go out on Sunday but when Carol left for school Monday morning, the taxi was gone so all's well that ends well, or at least that ends.

In over a year and a half, that is our first such experience so we are ahead of the game.  Carol thought it was great that Bach said to the driver "They are Vietnamese.  Don't cheat them!" We felt a bit bad that our bellman were caught in a situation but then again, isn't that why we live in a hotel?  By this morning, Ira had embellished the story slightly when he related it to other hotel staff.  He had single handedly fought off a huge taxi driver who wanted to commit mayhem on all of our persons and chased him screaming into the night. 

Sunday was stay home, go to the pool and watch DVD's.  We saw "A Place in the Sun," based on Dreiser's "An American Tragedy."  Montgomery Clift gives a compelling performance, prompting us to Google him and find out about his short life and career.

The weekends go too fast, leaving us to go about our business as usual, except that another blackout cancelled Ira's law class.  At least they called him on the mobile, enabling him to do some shopping and get a haircut.

Now we are sort of following the NCAA basketball tournament.  Like most people we revel in the upsets, especially if they are on our personal bracket sheet.  Since Ira's niece goes to UNC, we are sort of pulling for the Tarheels.  You know who a Carolina alum's two favorite teams are?  UNC and whoever's playing Duke.  Apparently, Duke's losing is even better than a Carolina win.  This year Duke lost in the first round so Carolina is now playing with house money.

One of Ira's students from his recent advanced class has asked for private lessons so he may have a bit more to do.  The young woman is already capable, but like most Vietnamese, needs work on tenses and pronunciation.  What, you don't think ira is a maven?  Hey, she could be learning from an Aussie!

We sympathize with our snowbound friends and relatives.  One thing we do not miss is winter in the northeast. Not that Hanoi weather is good.  Recently it has been dismally dark, cloudy and chilly.  We refuse to be daunted and every morning Carol braves the weather as she goes over 2 meters from hotel to taxi and about 100 meters from taxi to her classroom.

BEWARE!!!

Ira and Dick's father Charles, never Charlie and "don't call me Chuck!" must have been a careful person because he was always saying "Beware!"  Actually it was just on this day each year or as Ira has been told to say "ngày nàm hàng năm" that he would come downstairs at breakfast and keep saying "Beware!' until Ira and Dick, neither of whom enjoyed getting up early, would finally ask irritably "Beware of what?."

Finally, after being prompted to look at a calendar, they realized it was the Ides of March.  Ira loves to remember this tradition and he emails and sms to many people the warning, but no one, at least no one who is Vietnamese had the slightest idea what he meant.  He tried to explain about Julius Caesar but it didn't really take.

Charles aka Marvello, also used to sing a song that went something like "Many brave hearts are asleep in the deep so BEWARE, BEEEEEEEEEWARE!"  Our friend Joan Morris sang this on one of her albums with her husband Bill Bolcom and occasionally it creeps into one of their wonderful concerts, one of the things we miss along with a decent burger and Kaiser rolls.

Regardless, we send you all greeting and remind you to "Beware the Ides of March!"  Caesar didn't heed the warning and you all know what happened to him.

Ira bought Carol a new purse for International Women's Day(not celebrated in the US) from  rosymode.com, the website run by young Ms Nga, who decided at age 25 that she didn't want to work for anyone else.  She is one of an ever-growing number of young Vietnamese entrepreneurs. 

We found out that the sister of Ms Hai, whose wedding lunch we attended, is a truly famous fashion designer here in Hanoi.  We haven't yet visited her shop, but it seems like something to do.

Ira couldn't resist going back to the DVD store and buying some more discs, including several more Sherlock Holmes adventures.

Ira's cousin Sandy writes from time to time and he sent us a trivia quiz for old folks, a group of which we seem to be members, though we don't recall filing applications.  We did pretty well recalling hula hoops, The Lone Ranger and other memories of our misspent youth.  It is always great to hear from our friends and relations.  We've already touched on "weekend vacations."

What's next?  Stay tuned and we'll blog at you when something is interesting, at least to us.  Ira just learned to say "here's something interesting" in Vietnamese, but Ms An Son is afraid he is using the phrase way too much.  Well, too bad!  He like catch phrases.  Besides, Ira has already offered to write her a disclaimer giving her full credit for any progress he has made and taking full blame himself for any shortcomings.

DVD's and More

We had tickets to a symphony concert on Saturday so decided to go into the Old Quarter before dinner to do a little shopping and walk around a bit.  Carol wanted to get one of the small violins repaired and also to purchase some more violin bows and strings.  At the end of the year, the small violins that she was able to obtain as a donation from a company in the US will go to the Hanoi Conservatory to be used for young students who cannot afford their own instruments.  We were able to find the violin shop and communicate with them well enough to purchase bows and get a price for the violin repair.  Since UNIS will be donating some musical instruments to a Vietnamese school, Carol checked out the price and availability of the ones she wants to purchase.

We met Toan, the fashion designer, at Ms Hai's wedding and we decided to wander over to his shop.  It is rather small and has a limited but interesting selection.  Unfortunately they are cut for the Vietnamese women who are decidedly smaller than Carol.  She still may go back and have something made since his designs are not all for the 20 somethings.

On the way over to Toan's shop, we saw a new DVD store.  Unlike many, this was no hole-in-the-wall, but was large and brightly lit, with big open display racks.  They had an unbelievable collection of classical music DVD's:  operas, concerts and more!  they also had new and classic movies of all genres.  We could have spent the day there, but just grabbed a few titles, including one of the set of Sherlock Holmes films starring Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce.  Ira will return soon to swoop up the entire collection.

One of the DVD's we got was of Leonard Bernstein's "Young People's Concerts."  It was great to watch and to see the children and their parents at Carnegie Hall, all dressed up and attentive, and to see "Lenny" with his great teaching skills explain about how symphonic music works.  It is amazing today in our culture of sound bytes, instant gratification and backwards baseball caps to recall that these shows were on NETWORK television and drew a large audience. Also the orchestra was made up entirely of middle-aged white men.  No blacks, Asians or women were present. How times have changed!

We also watched "The Seven Year Itch" a classic comedy which, although a bit dated, is charming and witty and although it has an adult theme, it is not crude and of course the language is not at all offensive.  Marilyn Monroe was such a great comic actress and was so much fun in this film.  Of course she died tragically young and has now been gone for about 45 years!

The concert featured a piece that Carol has long loved:  the Dvorak Cello Concerto, together with the composers 8th Symphony, not so well known as his "New World" or 9th. 

We now begin another week that will no doubt include some surprises mixed into the routine of Hanoi Life.

Can You Understand Me?

Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder but is comprehension in the ear of the listener?  I sometimes go around the city being well understood, or at least my Vietnamese is understood, if not my sometimes circuitous conversational style, which I attribute to too many late nights listening to Jean Shepherd in bed.

On other occasions, I feel that he may as well be speaking Turkish as no one seems to get what I'm saying.  I say the name of a street and they shout back the name of a completely different one.  I say I have an appointment and they ask "Do you speak English?" often in an accent that sounds as if they are under water.  It may well be that I am not always careful with my pronunciation because I still have situations where my attempts are greeted with rapid fire responses indicating that the listener seems to have understood me well.

After far too long, I decided that I should see my  first Vietnamese teacher, Mr. Huy, so I invited him to lunch.  I emailed him in Vietnamese and we arranged to meet at a restaurant close to the Sofitel.  I hoped that I would be able to impress him with my command of the language so resolved to speak Vietnamese as much as possible.  Ms Son prepped me with topics that would be easy to discuss and I hoped for the best.

I have to say it went pretty well, although my comprehension rate was probably only about 65 %.  We talked about family and concerts and our mutual friend Mr. Luu.  I received an unexpected bonus when one of the students from my afternoon class called to tell me that she would be unable to attend.  Although she spoke English, I replied in Vietnamese to show Huy that I was using the language in everyday life.  When I got to class, the student asked me why I had spoken Vietnamese to her and I explained that I had been having lunch with my former teacher.  She and the rest of the class seemed to understand my motivation.

It was nice to see Mr. Huy again.  He was the one who gave me my basic foundation and who enabled me to manage as well as I have been able.  I'm still not fluent, but I try.  At least I am known as someone who speaks the language because many waitresses and shopkeepers greet me in Vietnamese when I appear.

Speaking of gout....Who was speaking of gout?  The doctor here felt that my inflamed big toe was a symptom of that disease and gave me anti-inflammatory pills which worked quickly.  Since gout has long been termed a rich man's disease, can it be that I am about to come into money???

When I told Ms Son at my Vietnamese lesson that I had  bệnh gút, she expressed no surprise as she felt I eat too much rich food all the time.  I tried to protest but she already has her notions about me which will probably never change.

Goin to the Chapel....

Well actually we were not at the chapel or any other ceremonial site, but we were honored to be invited to the wedding of Ira's former colleague, Ms Hai, or Ms Minh Hai as she is sometimes called.  If you've been keeping up, you know that we shared a meal with Ms Hai and her new husband Quang on the second day of Tet.

We were very excited to be invited to a Vietnamese wedding as we had not yet attended one.  We have seen many wedding parties going into the various hotels and restaurants around the city and wondered what the actual event would be like.

On advice from a variety of people we decided to bring a present, rather than an envelope with money.  If you saw the last installment of the blog, you can see the vase.  It is extremely heavy and takes a strong person to carry or lift it.

A Vietnamese wedding brings a whole new meaning to the question "bride's side or groom's side?"  Not only are there separate sides, but actually separate rooms.  We don't know whether this is because of space considerations or to avoid a brawl, but people have assured us that this is the usual thing.

We arrived at the Hoa Binh Hotel a few minutes before the appointed time, clutching our gift, to which we had attached a card to make sure that we would be identified as the givers.  Of course we need not have worried as none of the assembled guests seemed to be lugging any packages and we noticed them depositing envelopes into a container marked for that purpose.  The vase was getting pretty heavy but we were a bit afraid of leaving it unattended, not that anyone could carry it away.

Of course many of the guests knew each other so we just stood on the side waiting to be approached.  We noticed that the younger people were dressed much more casually than the older ones.  Owing to a sudden cold snap, Carol wound up wearing her velvet ao dai while Ira was in a suit.  Carol thought that only "chao ba" were wearing ao dai, that being the greeting for an older woman. 

We sat at a table for six, as there are no place cards, and wondered who would be forced to share the meal with "nguoi nuoc ngoai"(foreigners) of whom we were the only two.  Two young couples, one with a very tiny baby sat down and sort of nodded to us.

When we arrived, the table already had some food on it, together with warm beer and soda.  Servers then began bringing more dishes, all served family style.  One of our young table mates, Toan, spoke excellent English and it turned out that he is a fashion designer whose work appeared at the show we attended last year at Sofitel Plaza.  Two of his friends were also designers while the young woman with the baby taught art to art teachers.  The three were quite friendly and we talked about fashion and customs throughout the meal.

The bride and groom appeared and worked the room, pausing for pictures along the way.  Toan was  kind enough to snap one of us with Hai and Quang.  Can you tell us apart?

Both Quang and Hai kept telling us what an honor it was to have us there, but we told them the honor was ours that they chose to include us in their celebration.

There was a lot of food-chicken, crispy fish, shrimp and quail and we passed the plates back and forth while we chatted.  Unlike a Western wedding, there was no toast, no speeches and no community activity.  It was just a bunch of invited guests having a nice lunch together.  Perhaps this was typical, perhaps not.  If we receive another invitation we will let you know.